My Friend John
By Sally Liddick

John telephoned me a few days ago. He could barely talk. John was in the last chapter of his life on earth and he wanted to connect for prayer and Bible reading. John and I had bonded on many levels over the past several years, but our most meaningful way was a spiritual one. I felt privileged that Vivian and John would invite me into this most private time of their lives. I felt like more than family. A trusted friend.

My first recollections of John were from afar as a groomer going to Intergroom. Everyone knew of Nash Academy. John Nash was a young tiger in the grooming industry. A mover and shaker operating “the” top grooming school. He was slight built and not all that tall… but very, very cool! Sunglasses, long leather trench coats, limousines, cowboy boots, tight jeans, and cool shirts, dense black hair, “four o’clock shadow at 9 in the morning” and an air of hip-ness that was not usually part of the grooming industry. That was John.

Vivian was the gorgeous gal on his arm. A true raven-haired beauty with a soft voice and southern drawl. They were the perfect couple. Vivian was an award winning competitive groomer who brought style to the industry. John was the eligible, handsome grooming judge. They were the “Brad Pitt / Angelina Jolie” match of the grooming world.

I don’t remember when John and I met, but we liked each other. I always say that I am an acquired taste, like an olive or sauerkraut. John, with his sophisticated Northern New Jersey attitude, somehow took to this Pennsylvania Dutch groomer. And we would talk easily at shows.

When Gwen and I decided to put on our first grooming show, Groom Expo, it was no question that John would be in the line up. Not only did I think he would be a draw, but I trusted him to deliver a spectacular message to the industry. I was right. We had overwhelming attendance at our first show. Over 500 came to the educational seminar. An unheard of attendance at that time.

“I couldn’t believe it when I looked at that audience,” said John. “That ballroom was overflowing with groomers and more people than I had ever spoken to at one time. I was terrified.”

But he didn’t look it. That New Jersey cool kicked in and he spoke easily as he strutted back and forth across the stage in his cowboy boots. I came to realize that John always strutted when he talked… before an audience, in his home or on a cell phone.

As time went on, our lives criss-crossed in a special way. Gwen and I had a booth at the Atlanta Pet Fair. John and Vivian were there and had heard that we were planning a full grooming contest at Groom Expo. He and Vivian had a new vision for judging… a panel system where the decision was not left to one judge’s opinion, but an open discussion and collaboration much like a jury room. Judges would learn and share and openly discuss grooms. This was not the norm ten years ago.

Like many new ideas, their vision was a bit ahead of its time. Me? I am always ready for a new idea. Since judging was certainly not my bag, and I knew that John and Viv were well respected judges, I felt that this was a great opportunity and totally fair to the contestants and sponsors since prize money was climbing so rapidly. I jumped on it. And the IJA, International Judges Association was born, brain child of John and Vivian.

We took our idea to other shows to garner support for this new judging system. Naively, we fully expected to be greeted enthusiastically. Such was not the case, and a huge stalemate ensued. The industry split. Some friends on both sides got caught in the middle. Some bravely stuck to their guns, and others retreated under pressure.

Shocked and surprised, John and I had “each other’s backs” and blazed into this new contest world. Sponsors pulled out under pressure leaving us to sponsor some of our own contests. Boycotts of our shows were called. Some judges didn’t speak to each other. Long time friendships were broken. It was a terrible toll for a new idea. But John and I, backed by Gwen and Vivian, were committed. And we never wavered. When I was low, he was high and visa-versa.

In time, fences were mended, ideas were shared, changes were made, and all agreed that it wasn’t as big a deal as it seemed. But the biggest plus for me, was the incredible bond I forged with John. Looking back on it, if that had not happened, I would never have enjoyed the deep friendship that we shared.

We began to talk about all kinds of things. Personal and spiritual things. We just enjoyed being together and sharing ideas. An unusual pairing. The chubby Pennsylvania Dutch lady on a scooter and the slim New Jersey cool guy!

We became a team at shows announcing contest results and bantering back and forth. If I forgot something, he picked up and I did the same. Many would tell us how they enjoyed our camaraderie at the microphone. Perhaps they were being kind… but we kind of liked it, too.

Whenever we were at shows together, we would go out to dinner. And they would sometimes stop in our area for dinner when traveling through to New Jersey. We would be invited to their lovely home when in their area and would visit some of their favorite restaurants. He would finish your leftover lamb dish quicker than anything. That skinny guy could put it away!

Our first visit to John and Vivian’s home was astounding. John was always hesitant to share his personal abode lest it be misunderstood. But to not share it does a disservice to successful groomers everywhere.

Their home is a marvel valued in the seven figures. It is located on a private groomed countryside lane midst lakes, fountains, Arab sheik residences and prize winning Kentucky thoroughbreds standing behind manicured fenced acres. The winding road in was so impressive. You drove looking right and left to catch your first glance of their spectacular home.

The GPS said it was 500 yards away on the left. At first we couldn’t see it, so nestled was it among the huge gardens, trees and meandering stream. Driving in the stone driveway, a large garage with an apartment above stood on the right, and a glass garden room with John and Viv at the door welcomed us in.

“You have to see the gardens,” said Vivian, and so we did. They explained that they had planted everything in their yard. It was their passion. They moved plants, ferns, trees and flowers. The city boy had adapted well to country life. They were so proud of their home.

Later, over dinner, they told us of the history of the house. How it was designed by a famous architect. And how they had to replace one side wall that was collapsing after they bought it. A homeowner’s nightmare. The house had an amazing center atrium that went up several stories and the bedrooms overlooked the atrium space. Gwen and I were enthralled at its ambiance, the Nash’s style and their down home hospitality. It was showy, but beautiful and comfortable, as well.

Large glass windows opened out on all sides. “We see deer and all kinds of wildlife,” said Vivian. “We just love it so much.” They preferred an austere interior and chose comfortable desk chairs, to sofas and ottomans. They ran the business much of the time from their home.

Gas and wood fireplaces adorned the dining and living areas. Vivian’s art hung on the walls. She has a talent beyond grooming. John, as always, beamed as he showed “his honey’s skill.”

The thing that most radiated between them was their love for each other. I have never seen the likes of it. I kiddingly called them “Vivie-John” as they were one person. I never heard a cross word, although John said that if Viv shook her finger at him, she was really angry. She just smiled a coy smile. “I don’t think Vivian could be mad at anyone,” I offered.

John and Viv had another passion. Jamaica. Years ago, his brother and wife took a vacation with John and Viv. They ventured around the island and found some land at a very reasonable price. They worked out a sales agreement. Over time, they found someone to build a vacation home. Thus began a love for the poor, native contractor’s family, and the larger community of Brighton.

Poverty swallowed up these loving people and John and Viv began providing for the family, and educating the children privately as public schools were so far away. In time, one of the daughters came to learn grooming at the Nash Academy. Unfortunately, Jamaica had little use for groomers. John and Viv vowed to build a school for this community, and true to his word, they began in 2009. www.nashbrighton.com

John had a passion that he didn’t share with Vivian. Maseratis. He had two to my knowledge. He took us to his garage to see the newest one. His tenderness to the car was riveting. He adored it. With this rich man’s hobby, and the beautiful house, my reporter’s nature wanted to investigate. But, was that polite? I couldn’t help myself. I knew John had a job in the stock market. So I figured that he parlayed that into investments. Or perhaps, he came into an inheritance.

“No,” John said, “It came from grooming. The Maserati’s cost about what a new car would, and we drove older cars. Car payments went for the Maserati’s. When one was restored, I started on another.” The house was a bargain, needing work. Its mortgaged like everyone else’s,” he stated.

About three years ago, John’s brother passed away from bladder cancer. John took him and his family in while he endured treatments. He passed away at John and Vivian’s home. A few weeks later, John didn’t feel well. After tests, he began to live his brother’s nightmare with the same diagnosis. Rounds of chemo kept it at bay and gave him some periods of relief. At times he was well, healthy looking and determined to beat it. Though his health faltered, his spirit and compassion grew.

Our last good time together was after PetQuest in July 2009, after yet another major surgery. We were so happy to get together. I called him, before our visit and he was shopping “for me.” He was installing handicapped bars in his bathroom insisting on making his home comfortable when I arrived. It was like him to think of others.

He had added colors to his “Nash black” as well, with a brightly colored yellow “islands” shirt. He had his usual strut, that “New Jersey swagger.” We did restaurants and he felt well… and as usual finished up Gwen’s lamb chops.

Sadly we parted with several plants from their gardens to transplant at Gwen’s and my home. And those handicapped bars that he installed became more useful for him than me, as time went on.

After one surgery, I sent a beautiful orchid, on Gwen’s recommendation. He loved it and so began John’s passion for orchids. Even in his last days, Vivian would tell me he was cleaning his orchids when he had strength. When we visited after Groom Expo, his bed in the “garden room” was surrounded by colorful, vibrant orchids.

John, just 58 years old, passed away peacefully at home in the Garden Room on Dec. 17, 2009 at 10:27 am. His devoted wife, Vivian, was by his side. She never left him during his ordeal.

My great regret is that I never really interviewed him. I wanted to find out what made him tick. What were his life lessons? What did he regret? What did he do to be such a success in the grooming industry? But John was always more about the other person than himself. And we just never got to those topics. But I think I know some of the answers:

• Find a business partner that has the gifts that you need.
• Find a life partner who completes you. One that you enjoy being with.
• Buy a bargain and fix it up.
• Listen to people and take advice.
• Don’t stagnate. Take calculated risks. No risk. No reward.
• Dream big dreams. And then try to make them come true.
• Make quality a priority in your business.
• Speak softly and carry a big stick.
• Find something outside of work that you are passionate about.
• Do something good for your fellow man.
• Give to the Lord and He will give back to you.

Luke 6:38
“Give, and it will be given to you: good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over, will be given to you. For with the same measure you measure it will be measured back to you.”

Good work, John. You completed your mission in shorter time than most of us. We will remember you as a vibrant star in the grooming industry. You left us wanting more. More of your spirit. More of your ideas. More of your integrity. More of your smiles. More of your caring. More of your vision. More of your faith. More of your friendship. Just more of you.